Let's Talk About Sex in Songs...

I think I have reached the ripe old age of whatever it was that my parents started cringing at the songs that were on the radio. However, gone are the seemingly innocent days and sultry sounds of Marvin Gaye as we welcome a new era of pop songs with dance beats and hidden meanings. That's not to say that lyricists didn't hide innuendos in songs 20, 30, and 40 plus years ago. Sex has always been a topic of interest in the human mind. Maybe it's just that I didn't notice it as much before the words started coming out of my teen daughters' mouths. Somehow, songs lose their luster when heard that way.

One of the most popular songs in 2015 was "Cake on the Ocean" by DNCE. I think it has a catchy chorus. In fact, the chorus is all I know and when the song comes on it's all I sing. I have a habit of blasting iHeart Radio or Pandora when I'm cooking, cleaning, or writing. Often my daughters will take over and choose their favorite stations when they tire of mine. One day, my eldest daughter and her best friend (both 14 years old) and my youngest daughter (12 years old) were hanging in the living room with me when "Cake by the Ocean" came on. I sang along. Hilarity ensued.

My daughter and her best friend melted in a fit of giggles. "Don't you know what that song is about?" Of course I do. It's about eating cake by the ocean. Who doesn't like that? To tell the truth, I've lived within driving distance of the Gulf Coast my whole life and I have not once eaten cake by the ocean. Sandwiches, chips, beer... Yes. Cake. No. It was then I was informed that this song was about sex by the ocean. What? That never occurred to me. In fact, that sounds down right uncomfortable.

So here are the facts. The songwriters say it could be about sex or it could be about cake. It started about a misunderstanding about the drink Sex on the Beach. So, I guess the song could literally be about eating cake by the ocean or sex on the beach. Either way it is filled with titillating lyrics like, "See you licking frosting from your own hands/Want another taste, I'm begging you, yes ma'am". You be the judge...

Added with permission from Pixabay.com

I don't know very much Spanish but I know enough to understand that "Despacito" (2016) by Luis Fonsi Featuring Daddy Yankee and Justin Bieber is sensual. The word despacito translates to slowly so that right there should tell you something. There's not many things in life you sing about doing slowly. It's not about going to school or doing taxes, I can tell you that. I had a false sense of security for a short while. Then I discovered that my 14-year-old translated the lyrics and memorized the Spanish words to the song. It's poppy and she's industrious - what else would she do?

The one that got to me was my 12-year-old singing, "If you wanna a menage I got a tricycle," from Ariana Grande's "Side to Side" (2016). I think back and wonder if this is any worse than me singing the lyrics to "Love in an Elevator" (Aerosmith 1989) or "I Want Your Sex" (George Michael 1987). And the answer is YES! Because it's my kid doing it! I asked her if she knew what she was saying and thankfully she didn't. However, the 14-year-old did. Oh, man. Not to mention the song itself is about having so much sex you can't even walk straight!Oh, Ariana...

There is still some innocence in this story. Bruno Mars has a song titled "Versace on the Floor" (2016). The first time I heard it with my kids in the car I waited to see if they could catch the meaning of the song. I asked if they knew what Versace was. My youngest daughter said it was a man (partially true) and my eldest daughter said it was a sauce. You wouldn't believe how hard I laughed at that. At least they haven't learned everything they need to know about the birds and the bees just yet. I think I'll just let them keep thinking it's about a man covered with sauce lying on the floor. Works for me.

Added with permission from Pixabay.com

It is hard to think about songs that are not about love in some way. Sensual love, erotic love, true love, romantic love, one-night stands, broken hearts, friendship, looking for love, etc. Mix in a catchy tune and it's hard not to sing along. Add censorship, a la the PMRC, and conditions are ripe for finding creative ways for expression. It makes taboo subjects even more exciting. My 12-year-old told me this morning that she hoped the advice I give was to tell people to keep an open mind and to just talk to their kids about what they hear. I think the best advice I can give is to listen to our kids.

I would love to hear your stories about misheard lyrics, awkward moments about songs or anything else you can think of that has to do with music - especially if it has to do with parenting. Comment below, tweet me, or send me a message! I'll be sure to reply.