I've never been one of those mom who can't possible spend one night away from my children. Especially if their grandparents, aunts or uncles wanted to spend quality time with them. They're not going to be young forever and I am all for sharing this time everyone. Plus it comes with the benefit of some much needed "Us Time" for mom and dad. So why is it that other children have such a hard time sleeping over here?
I'm not a bad cook. It's true that sometimes I get a wild hair and try something new. Sure there are times that it doesn't work out, but more often than not, the new recipe ends up being a keeper. Occasionally even a family favorite. I love to cook and we often have big home cooked meals. Of course, I've been told by my kids' guests that my home cooking is not like their mom's. Maybe what's unusual is that we don't eat a lot of fast food, convenience foods, or pre-made meals. I make most everything from scratch because certain preservatives give me migraines. Maybe that changes the taste of things. Neither my husband nor I have a sweet tooth so we don't keep a lot of sweets around the house. Maybe that's the deal breaker. But we loosen up the rules when the kids have friends over. They can have more sodas and junk food while watching movies. I try to make it more like a party than an everyday event. Food is rarely an issue in our house.
Maybe I'm just too strict. I don't allow food and drink anywhere but the living and dining rooms. I just don't want ants in the bedrooms. I make sure they brush their teeth. I'm pretty strict about hygiene, especially your teeth. You only get one set of permanent teeth and dentures totally creep me out. I make sure everyone likes the movies that are picked and games that are played. I don't really set a bed time so long as you don't keep me up. My husband and I try to disappear into our bedroom pretty early so as not to interfere with the kids' fun. So I can't be too much of a wicked witch.
Maybe we're boring. Maybe the Wii, PS3, karaoke, movies and TV aren't enough. (Hey, we like our entertainment. Sue us.) If that's not enough, the kids have toys, but they must not be cool enough. Kids still say 'cool', right? Granted, we make our kids play without modern conveniences for most of the hours of the day. We just always felt that the imagination was the best tool that they will ever have. We didn't want them becoming the zombies of the next generation. You know, like the adults you see now that are glued to their phone screens; total zombie mode. I see that happening already. Some of my kids' friends are lost without their internet connection to their various devices (we won't give them our password). They end up resorting to playing outside most of the time unless I allow them to play video games. And I do allow it. A lot. I'm not a total wet blanket.
Am I scary? My little 5'2" frame? My kids' friends are bigger than I am and some of them will barely speak to me. I admit that my "Mom Voice" can be a little intimidating. But I use that on my kids. I soften it up when I need to correct a behavior with the friends. Am I so scary that they can barely speak to me? Or that they don't want to spend the night? My kids have two friends that have gone home in the middle of the night and one that won't even consider staying over. But my kids spend the night at their houses all the time. I just don't get it.
Maybe I just raised my kids differently. Maybe I just raised them to have fun and be more trusting. They know that I am always here for them whether they can see me or not. I raised them to feel secure in themselves and in their environment. Spending the night at a friend's house should be part of growing up. A kid should experience different family dynamics and break other people's rules. A kid should stay up late, giggling and telling stories. Kids should do their best to scare each other and make fun of the one that crashes first. Kids should play games and laugh till they pee. They should form friendships that will last through childhood and memories that will last forever. I want that in my house. I want my home to feel safe and still be fun. I want my kids' friends to stay the night. I want to hear laughter and arguments. I want those memories to form here.
As far as I can see, my kids are becoming very well rounded. They get to be parented by other parents. Push other boundaries. Explore other cultures. Taste other foods. They may not know it, but they are deciding on what kind of parent they will become by seeing other families first hand. I may be awesome, but I know that I can't be everything to my kids. Maybe these other kids, the ones that don't like staying away from home, are truly missing out on something wonderful. There may be no place like home, but my home is like no place else.
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